Rosie Allen - BTEC Acting
Monologue 1: Comedy
Rebecca from 'Immaculate' by Oliver Lansley
Rebecca:
Hi, look... there's something I have to say. I know I should have told you earlier but I didn't think it was going anywhere, but now I think it is... or thought it was... But now you're pregnant, not that you're keeping it, right? God, you're huge...
Look, Michael and I are together. We're a couple. I'm sorry I didn't tell you, but now you tell me you're pregnant and you say you haven't had sex with anyone since Michael which means he must be the father... Which means you're lying to me, and he's lying to me, and I'm lying to you, and you're fucking him, and I'm fucking him and he's fucking you... and me... and I'm going to lose my best friend and my boyfriend. And I'll be helpless and hopeless and friendless and loveless and die old and alone with thread veins and bladder problems and a house full of cats!
Workshop 1
Today we performed our monologues and received feedback from the rest of the class. At this point, I haven't learnt it yet and I felt that, understandably, this was a barrier to my acting when I performed in today's lesson. The very nature of this monologue is very fast paced and frantic, which is what gives it its comedic element and this was one of the pieces of redirection I was given in today's lesson - to really try and build momentum up to the climax of the piece where the character gets completely hysterical at the end of the monologue. Once I tried this, I was able to illict a response from the rest of the class and I understood more than I had done previously where the comedy moments and opportunities are in the text. I aim to have learnt the piece by next lesson as well as cutting it down to the target time frame of 30-40 seconds (SEE LEFT FOR CUT VERSION).
Workshop 2
Today we continued to work on and develop our pieces for assessment. I was still struggling to pick the energy up as the character build momentum before reaching the end of the monologue in complete hysteria and this is something that has been commented on before by teachers and my peers in order to raise my energy levels and maintain a wider circle of attention that spans beyond my immediate surroundings and out to an imaginary audience instead of keeping my performance insular and understated, especially with comedic pieces like this. Despite this, however, I was more able to explore the character's vocal and physical qualities without the barrier of the script in my hand, having learnt the lines over the past week and this definitely had a positive impact upon my performance today. I feel that my main challenge to overcome as an actor is to be mindful of my energy levels and widen my circle of attention when in an audition or performance situation.
Monologue 2: Contrasting (Dramatic)
Sophie from 'Boys' by Ella Hickson
SOPHIE:
Do you - have you ever actually felt any... guilt? Because it's come as a bit of a surprise that, um - you, one- I don't, can't actually feel it. Like it's not something I can generate somehow, like, I - I find myself having to actually summon it, trying to encourage myself and even then I can't do it. I thought it might be shock at first, and then grief or - but all I can feel is total joy, total - peace. I look at you and I sometimes actuallly make myself think of him, I force him into my head and I don't feel guilty. What kind of person does that make me? Sometimes I think it's because - what we have is love, meant to be. That we love each other, yes, Mack, that is what I sometimes think. Is that ridiculous? I sat at his funeral looking at his parents and Benny but all I could think of, all I could feel - was you. But then I look at you and I wonder if it's actually there. I wonder if I added up the amount of minutes, hours, fucking days I've spent thinking about you, the amount of fucking longing I have done - if I added that up and weighed it against anything you've ever actually said... But then you do the smallest thing - you make me a cup of tea when I don't ask, or you touch my hand really lightly in a room full of people and I think no, Sophie, don't laugh - don't laugh because it's real and it's so much more real because it's unsaid and unspoken and un - un - it's so much more real because I can't touch it, because we can't say it and I can't see it. It's so much more real because I don't know if it's there. Please say something... Please...
Workshop 1 (mock audition panel and peer assessor)
The first time I performed my monologue to the mock audition panel and my peer assessor, the feedback was, overall, very positive. It was commented upon that it had a lot of potential as a piece and I felt that I was able to respond to the direction and constructive criticism that I was given in a way that was very beneficial to my own process of preparing this monologue. One piece of direction that I received was to think about the action of 'wringing' (one of the key Laban Efforts) as my internal drive for the monologue and, when I repeated the monologue taking on board this suggestion, I felt that it really added another layer to my acting as the character had an underlying subtext of guilt at not feeling guilty, because she knows she should feel guilty for what happened, but is unable to summon this emotion within herself and that in itself makes her feel a kind of guilt. Another piece of direction that I received was to play the emotion of anger throughout the entire monologue, whether it be anger at herself, anger at Mack or anger at her ex-boyfriend. Again, this really aided me in my portrayal and exploration of the character. Initially, I found it challenging to play an emotion that seemed so counter-intuitive to how I had been practising the speech beforehand, but eventually I grew more comfortable with it and my peer assessor noted that the performance became much more believable when this piece of direction was taken on board.
Workshop 2 (different peer assessor)
Today we worked in random pairs and worked on our pieces. I found that this was an incredibly beneficial exercise as I was able to get direct and specific feedback from a completely different person who had never seen either piece before, meaning that I received different feedback which I can apply to my piece as I prepare in the run-up to the assessment next week. It was commented upon that my emotions were very clear, a result of the direction I received in the previous workshop (SEE ABOVE) and that my eyeline was focused and the audience could tell that I was talking to one person directly in front of me. It was suggested that I make the initial few lines even more numb emotionally, in order to strike a greater contrast between the beginning and the middle climax of the piece and, when I applied this to the speech, I felt that I was able to build momentum and acceleration much more effectively and believably so that there were more emotional and vocal dynamics within the piece, which is important to convey in an audition situation as the panel only has a short space of time in which to see everything you have to offer as an actor. Between now and the assessment, I plan to compile all of the feedback I have received for this monologue and use it all to really polish up the piece so I can perform it to the best of my ability.
Physical/Ensemble Workshop Audition
[My Response]
My initial expectations of an ensemble workshop audition were that it would most likely involve some level of group improvisation, physical theatre and also working with an unfamiliar text in order for the audition panel to assess each auditionee's spontaneity, openness to other people's ideas, teamwork, listening skills, commitment and overall attitude towards approaching difficult tasks. In many ways, the actual content of this particular audition scenario was very close to my expectations and I think that having thought about the possible types of task we could be expected to do in the context of a workshop audition prepared me for the challenges we were faced with. Nothing surprised me and knocked my confidence as I had already thought quite carefully about what things might come up in that situation.
Towards the end of the lesson, we reached the 'cut' stage of the audition where we stood in a line and were asked to step forward if we thought, taking into account how we felt we performed up until then, we would be recalled. No one stepped forward and, when asked why, many of the answers were very similar to my own reasoning for not stepping forward. I personally thought that finding the perfect balance between getting too involved by taking the lead too much in the group and sitting back and not contributing anything to the task at hand. I struggled to find and maintain this balance and I found that I really had to focus on both myself and others around me in order to succeed in this aspect of an ensemble audition. Hopefully, with practice, I will become more used to dealing with this kind of situation and find it easier to strike this important balance. I also felt that perhaps my ideas weren't original enough to stand out in a positive way and that I maybe need to let go a little bit more in the future in order not to inhibit my creativity as well as taking more risks and having confidence in my own ideas and ability. There were, however, positive aspects of my performance in the audition so far that I was able to identify such as listening to instructions and genuinely being a team player and working well in a group of people.
Overall, there were both challenges and enjoyable moments of this audition scenario. As previously stated, I found it difficult to keep a balance between taking over too much versus sitting back completely and not contributing at all. I also felt that I need to work on opening myself up more in terms of taking risks and allowing myself to be as creative as possible. On the other hand, though, I really did enjoy this workshop and liked the physical theatre aspects and warm-up activities that helped us lose our inhibitions around each other, although this level of comfort wouldn't be as readily achieved if we were auditioning alongside people we didn't know at all.
Monologue 3: Contrasting (Serio-Comic)
Fran from 'The Line That Picked Up 1000 Babes and How It Can Work For You' by Eric Berlin
FRAN:
I only came here on other time. That was enough. I went up to the bar to get a drink and this guy came over to me and he said - "Hi!" in this way that implied that what he was really saying was, "Boy are you lucky! Of all the girls here, I've decided to talk to you!" Luck me. He said to me, "What's your name?" I said, "Fran." He said, "That's a beautiful name." Fran? Fran. The name my father gave me out of revenge when I wasn't born a boy. Fran is a lot of things but none of them is beautiful. No. So, then he says, "Hey! You Italian?" I said, "No," and start to walk away, but he grabs my arm and says, "Hey! You Irish?" "What is this? NO! Goodbye!" And he says, "So! What are you then?" "Nothing! I'm nothing!" And he stopped, and looked at me, and he said, "Oh. I guess you're right. You're nothing." And he smiled this smile that really made him king of the mountain. This smile that said that I was nothing because I wouldn't talk to him, this GUY. Men are bad enough but there's nothing worse than GUYS. He called me nothing. This asshole with the top two buttons of his shirt undone to show that he had no chest hair. This guy with his conceited, judgemental smile called me "nothing." Should that have bothered me? What he thought? Maybe not. But it did. So I left. If this is where this guy belongs, then it's not where I belong, so I left. And never came back 'til Ellen dragged me here tonight. And since then I have this bias against guys I meet in bars. Maybe I shouldn't, but I do. There it is.
Workshop 1
In today's lesson, I performed my second contrasting monologue for the first time to the rest of the class and received some formative feedback on my performance. The class as a whole agreed that it was a really good fit for me as a performer and suited me well, and I think that, once I become more comfortable with the piece and learn the lines, it has the potential to be a really effective speech that will showcase a different aspect of my acting skillset and a contrasting character from the other two pieces I have done/prepared for assessment. One area of potential development that was commented upon was making a clearer vocal distinction between the character I am playing and the guy she is quoting directly, whom she had previously encountered at a singles bar. I found this quite challenging initially and it is something that I will consider carefully and work on before the next lesson.
Workshop 2
Today we worked in random pairs and developed our pieces. The feedback I received was incredibly beneficial to me personally as I felt that I made a substantial amount of progress on this monologue. I was still struggling at this point to vocally differentiate between Fran and the guy she quotes in the speech and it was suggested that I use an accent to distinguish between the two of them as well as vocal pitch to clarify this distinction to the audition panel/audience. I tried utilising a general American accent and deep vocal pitch, using my chest resonator, and this was incredibly effective as I was able to define both characters more effectively. It also brought out the comedic moments of the piece, which stem from Fran's imitation of the guy and, as comedy is something that I personally struggle with, this was a really good springboard to discover the comic moments of the monologue.